Tuesday, October 17, 2017
Monday, October 16, 2017
Friday, September 22, 2017
Scorpio's energy is intense and the intensity combined with a darker part of a season can scare you a little. Scorpio is the ruler of the underworld and can magically transform you without one knowing; Scorpio works in the dark for the better of mankind, it delves into those corners of our minds; in some sense, Autumn can take a darker turn then Winter hence Halloween, Dia de los Muertos, and All saints day, all Holidays that celebrate death, symbolic to the days ahead. After you dive into the dark with Scorpio, you come out on the other end with jovial Sagittarius. The last of the fire signs and a mutable one. This signs represents knowledge, a wide perspective, seeing a connection in everything, expansion, warmth in a rather chilly season, the right sign you want to have leading you into your winter years.
Sagittarius is also the sign that represents philosophical thinking and explorer. Like spring but at a much older and wiser age, you question everything; the questions are more complex; at times, because of bluntness, they can be seemingly innocent, sort of winking at the idea that the kid in us never dies. Autumn takes you back inside and it becomes more we and instead of I in conversation. All three signs energy work well in Autumn and help us to understand what may come in our Autumn years of life. This is the end of the circle. Welcome to Autumn.
Thursday, August 24, 2017
for your fall
if someone has it
in there mind
to push you
back in time
you have to
be aware they're
in there power
to make sure
you're set back,
even if its an hour...
blame in this
you don't see you
as others see you,
It's like looking for
a word in a crossword...
you've been searching,
determined, found words
that's not on the list, you
grunt, you laugh, your
mind drifts and then
that one person walks
up and finds it quick. "God damn it"
Tuesday, August 8, 2017
What is life?
I don't know. I use to think life was what we do everyday and I'm starting to realize, life is what we make it. One monday evening, I was sitting at a bar enjoying my beer, listening to the jazz band play and this guy, I wanna say late 40s walked up and asked the bouncer, "I got two dollars. You mind if I leave these two dollars on each end of the pillar?"
The bouncer said yes and the man balanced his dollar bills on the pillars. The man then turned to me and a few others on the patio and he said, "bet you two dollars, nobody takes these two dollars sitting here."
I thought in my head, you just lost two dollars sir; however I was curious. As asinine as I thought the expirement was, I watched people walk by the money and not even flinch in its direction. After about 10 minutes, the two dollars remained.
I was baffled.
Everyone that walked in, I asked them, "did you see the two dollars on the pillars at the entrance?" They responded with yeah, I did. I questioned why they didn't take it, they gave me there answer and moved on.
Everyone who walked in I asked if they all saw the two dollars. Everyone said yes, everyone had a different reason for not taking it.
The bouncer walked away twice, one homeless guy zeroed in on it like a hawk to a mouse but kept walking, another homeless guy started asking for money while standing next to the two dollars. I told him, "take the money" and he walked off with out it.
Not one soul that night (besides the guy conducting the experiment and the bouncer occasionally placing the money back) touched the money. Two hours had gone by and not one soul. The guy came back and he was impressed.
By this time, some of my bar buddies showed up and we were drunk, impressed, and swooned by the jazz band.
So what is life?
Well what I learned from that expirement was this: position is gold. All walks of life passed the money and nobody touched it, a few were tempted but nobody took it. 10 people all had different reasons and I realized perspective plays a huge role. Position and perspective.
Everyone views things differently but put something in the right position and you get the same results. Sun Tzu mentions in the Art of war that "strategy defines a position as what is known about a given competitor; to understand your own position, Sun Tzus tactic forces you to see yourself in the eyes of others.
Everyone at some point has had money and knows the value; even though the money was in a vulnerable yet humble position, it had the raft of a thousand suns; the dollars made people change.
What is life?
Life is change. Life is position. Life is confusing and contradictory, life is growth and "aha!" moments life is a multitude of fascinating unexplained events, life is feeling feelings that you thought were dormant inside of you but are very much alive, life is simple, life is people's memories because a lot of us still live in the past, life is everything you speak.
A lot of religions complicate life yet the earth gives us subtle easy clues in my opinion on what is life. Our four seasons shows us that everything in life eventually comes to a season of death for a short period and eventually a rebirth.
This repeated process happens on a large and small scale all at the same time. The seasons inbetween act as growth periods and usually the death of one thing is a position switch for another. Imagine that concept happening every second, rebirth and death on a wide scale, from someone actually dying down to the death of a career or a relationship and you see the collision that is life.
So what is life? The answer will always change, one man told me something his wife told him "nothing hasn't changed in the past 20 years, you're just looking at it differently."
Now apply that and aforementioned comments all into a blender and you get, what is life? Its hard to pinpoint because at some point, my consiouness will shift again because that's what life is, it's a constant change of positions. All of us shine, some better than others but remember that shine also cast the dark.
In conclusion, the earth shows us in action, what life is. It shows us through the rotation around the sun that position is key for certain things to flourish and certain things to die. It shows us that each season serves a purpose. For example, if you try to grow crops in January, one can look foolish; kind of similar to an older woman or man acting like imbeciles in there 40s. On the flip side, the earth shows us position. Some places can grow crops in the dead of winter, so is it foolish if you have the means? Same applies for people. If one pays close attention to the seasons, your thoughts become global and you slowly expand out into our solar system and universe. You start seeing a patteren in your studies, you begin to wonder if the simple concept of seasons apply in our universe but on grander or smaller scales?
There's a repeated process: birth, climax, death and it repeats. Everything from the suns position as a metaphor of the dollars on the pillar, down to the perception of people and the irony of a starving man rejecting money still leaves one in a jumbled mess about life. What is it? The God energy moves so swift that changes happen before time, and then it comes to us as a thought; that God energy, its done 2 million moves since your one thought and another 2 million since your action; of course contradictions are born, accidents, perfect moments and etc are born. It happens so quick, and at the same time slowly so we understand there is something greater. What is life?
Wednesday, August 2, 2017
Student: our out look?
Student: I don't know...maybe the way we treat each other?
Prof: you're warm, think you can nail it home?
Summer: we're a cold world. Since the exlposion of technology, we tend to lean more on our technology, if you ask a question people are quick to tell you to google it.
Prof: Interesting. Why do you think that is, summer?
Summer: Because we don't know the answer ourselves. Everyone is too busy, the pace of life is a lot quicker so the need for comradery, to connect with people face to face has become....
Summer: not exactly pointless but....its--- times have changed.
Prof: pointless...so there's no need for human interaction?
Summer: there's a need for it but not in the old way. It's much quicker to express how you feel through abbreviation/text.
Prof: what about now? We're communicating without a device...
Summer: well I need my grade miss.
Prof: All about the grade huh summer..
Summer: well I love this class--
Prof: I know I'm kidding with you
Summer: I think this shines light on chemistry.
Prof: oooo that's interesting..
Summer: well its been said that phereomones and other smells isn't real among humans and its only an animal thing; but clearly we follow people on social media but don't like them in real life....I think that's kind of strange.
Prof: you're right, it is. It's strange. But you're leaving out a lot of things like maybe the person on facebook or IG (as you guys call it) might like one particular thing about a person, maybe relationships, religions, beliefs, standards play in this. It's easy to show how you feel online, a lot harder to translate that into actual word...possibly this shines light on emotional intelligence?
Sunmer: how so?
Prof: There's a time and place for everything and a right way to say things. For example, "Summer, your fucking breathe stinks!" Is kind of harsh vs "hey dude, your breathe stinks here's some gum" Is a lot more subtle, honest, and loving. Everyone deep down knows when they're screwing up but its approach that will get the person to agree; attack is not one of them, but we associate negative with attacking.
Student 3: There's a chinese proverb or quote that relates to this...
Summer: you're thinking of Buddha I believe its... "In a controversy the instant we feel anger, we have already ceased striving for the truth, and have begun striving for ourselves."
Student 4: what about, "you will not be punished for your anger but punished by your anger"
Summer: that part.
Prof: There's a lot of animosity in today's world is what I'm sensing from your responses.
Summer: the anger was already there it just became more clear with social media. We need anger but people fear anger. We're strangers to each other so we don't know each other's tipping points; social media kind of highlights through pictures and comments what kind of person one is.
Prof: hmm..so you're saying one is able to judge a book by its cover because people who have a similar look and comment a similar way or agree on a topic are the same? Therefore if 5 are like this 6 and so on are similar? If that's the case, then technology is no different than people watching at a coffee shop.
Student 1: well it is...on social media you say what you really mean; versus out in public, in person, nobody is going to speak what they're really feeling.
Prof: Because of fear?
Summer: yeah, I mean not everybody, most are the same online as they are in person but on average most people fear others
Prof: Its okay to fear others, its shows we understand position and have respect. Ok class our hour is up see you next week; btw papers are graded. Summer, can you hang back for a sec...
Summer: what's up?
(Classroom clears out)
Prof: I loved your paper, "What is life?" But I gave you a B minus...
Summer: oh...ok...uh, why?
Prof: some grammitcal errors but I feel you know more, I want to challenge you, push you a little more...
Summer: ok...so do you want me to rewrite the paper?
Prof: yep. Your grade is already counted for; so if you write the paper and I feel it falls below your b minus you stay with your orginal grade, if you write an A paper, I'll give you the A.
Summer: oh sweet...I think...what was the highest grade?
Prof: I'm not allowed to disclose that info but lets just say your paper set the curve.
Summer: oh...but isn't this opinion?
Prof: It is. A lot of people copied each other which is why I'm having you re-write your paper.
Prof: yeah, so no more sharing your paper?
Summer: I needed cash.
Prof: yep, all college students do...so Summer, What is life?
Tuesday, August 1, 2017
That definition wraps it up but does our society agree? Does our biology agree? Since the begginning of our existence, the way we survived were in groups. It's how we bond, protect, grow, nourish, it's who we are today but most importantly it's how we win the game of life.
Groups spawned villages which in turn drived our cities, which brought cultures closer, combining cultures thus creating anew; from inventions down to fashion and the way we speak, groups are the way of life. But what is life?
"The existence of an individual person." How can one be an individual when in a group you have to conform to an alpha way of thinking? The moment you have a different opinion in a group, one becomes an outcast. Our society was created off following trend. Alphas set the trend.
What is life? Our society is fake. The alphas set the trend, the marketers spot it and they manipulate the rest. The brain is sensitive. It takes 3 weeks to form a solid brain pathway, it takes minutes to lay the ground work. The moment its advertised, you have been influenced. What is life?
Life is to have freedom of opinion, freedom of thought, in the game of life you do have freedom but to an extent. When this society was created, its said that ancient knowledge was hidden which lead to a rise of religions. Part of that knowledge was an understanding of the mind.
What is God? God is us. God is our brain pathways which have been manipulated. God in this society is created through religion. Religion has mixed truth with lie. The truth is we can speak anything through the tounge, the lie: was that what you wanted or was that manipulation?
With technology in place, its easier to see what you want, to pray to God and 15 minutes later or to be realistic some days, months later your speech becomes real. The real God, the energy, the universe whatever you call her/him, moves through the fake society as well. The real God is everywhere.
What is life? Its not this, its not the society you see today. Its not our religions or all the marketing thrown at us. Its not getting up to go buy something, its not going to work, sitting in traffic, this is not life; buying stuff, television, internet/social media marketing is all part of a game, when you take that away, what are you left with? That emptyness you feel, its not empty, its life. Nobody knows what's it like to live unless one is rich. You've played the game, changed the rules.
So I ask you, what is life?
Monday, July 31, 2017
Don't apologize for being rude, don't be kind or bend, that niggas ego is bullshit, that ego is full of sin...that shit will get you caught up, beliving lies, living a life that's not your's but in a fake society your lies seem real...never apologize for being rude...
Thursday, July 27, 2017
Thursday, July 13, 2017
play some games,
I watch the games,
every blue moon
I play, they find it
strange, for me watching
is calming, everyday,
all day I compete,
so to play a video
game doesn't help
it puts me
is distracting but
violence only makes
me have a negative
Friend: stop being a little bitch, pussy. Here, just try this first round, its mind blowing.
Summer: I, I just dont understand. I don't hate it, I enjoy watching you guys play.
Friend: come get some bitch.
Summer: (picks up pipe, takes a hit, blows out smoke, picks up controller, kind of coughing) ok bitch...
and glaring lights
escapes into wee
hours of the night,
laughing and mindlessly
killing, like a glass of
milk spilling, I've
has left the building,
are through the ceiling,
made, we laugh
at mistakes, the
our senses, letting
down our defensive
ironic we're playing
a shooting game,
we have no offense its,
Friend: bruh, cereal sounds bomb right now.
Summer: yea.....we should get captin crunch, with two BIG ASS scoops of vanilla Ice cream... (looks at 3rd friend) when did you get here?
3rd: I've been here...remember an hour ago? I was eating cereal...
Friend: oh yeah, wuss up.
Summer: sooo do you have anymor--- can you do a vanilla ice cream captin crunch run? Lol
Friend: oh! And beer please...lol
Tuesday, July 11, 2017
but I'm not
I stand, you
and your man,
ya'll got kids,
just fix what
you have, if
you need me
me I got your
back just don't
lie to me about
that, I'm not
a savage nor
despite what past
people will tell you,
yeah I've made
is great I
to love and
you love me
one way, but
your speech is
eyes are infused
a flirty flame
you feel, the
feel begin to
thrill, so whose
gonna foot this
bill? Lies are
and trust, a
to bust, is it
worth the thrust?
Is it worth the nut?
Is it worth the butt?
Is it worth the but?
Either way an
asshole is involved
and no problems
blow at the
job, so I'm
using my head
so I don't bust,
kind of ironic
I must say
lies or should I call it
a lay? In
so if I give you
the lei its to
but I prefer to
keep the peace
there's no need to
fight over my D, I
she is married and
its going to be a problem
if I slide up in the middle,
I slid into her DMs, she hid it
for some months, oh, you don't
know about our diner dates
and lunch, sending her to
work with those hickeys on
her neck, is only gonna make
me send her back to you a wreck,
leave the na na wet but she ain't
fuckin you tonight, she layed up in
the sheets dreamin bout my dick
inside, she likes her hair pulled, I
saw the look she made, I've
been cheated on don't nobody like
being played, she tellin you the truth
Her and I we behaved, you fighting
with your girl you only pushing her away,
she told me about the tantrum, calling me
Deon, its not a good look that's how you
get cheat on.
Monday, July 10, 2017
to fly to
kiss the lips,
feel the warmth
feel the shine,
but like those
before me they
told me about
the sun, they
told me skies
in the ashes
again, I will
rise, I will
a way to
kiss the sun
you have to
so far has
on top mastered
the glare, they
kiss the sun
and now they
its like they
the light so
even if its
be there I'm
I will get to
the top, I
close to the
Saturday, July 8, 2017
(Phone vibrates on bed)
Girl: hi. 😊
Summer: how's it going? 😊
Girl: what are you up to?
Summer: nothing, just finishing it up my paper for philosophy class. You?
Summer: ok so you text me at 1:25 in the morning---
So are you down to fuc---
What do you wa---
Girl: sooo...what is your paper about?
Summer: its about life and its titled what is life?
Girl: oh that sounds cool...would love to read it one day...
Summer: how about right now?
Girl: right now? It's 1:30 in the morning and I'm kind of tipsy.
Summer: Even better, you don't have to read the whole thing...how about we paraphrase it over a bottle of wine?
Girl: wine? 😍 ok!! Be home in 20...do you have enough for my girls?
Summer: girls? Umm sure...how many?
Girl: its just three of us...
Summer: oh...yeah, np...
Girl: yea!! See you in a bit. 😙
Friday, July 7, 2017
Thursday, July 6, 2017
trill, 100 dollar
bills, flossin on
the gram for the
glam, I miss
Stephanie but her
man, well he's, and
she's, let's just say
bee's get violent when
you near the hive, and
I'm a bear with the honey...
Trill, 100 dollar
bills, flossin on
the gram that part
is a lie, I'm taking
pictures of the sky,
yet I'm reaching for
space, I'm scared of
heights so my success
is delayed, it's like I get
the momentum and I look
behind, like you not high
enough stop looking behind,
the ground is still close, fear is
mind, own the mother fucker,
my fear is mine, you need your
vision clear and fear can blind,
I build Rome at night so I don't
see the grind, I fall when the sun
rise, rise when the sun shifts, eat
a quick breakfast take a shower,
take a shit off to my shift, this is
some bullshift, I guess everything
in life at some point has to shift...
Wednesday, July 5, 2017
Everyone is drunk
Everyone is happy
I see some people
On the couch there
In full Conversation
I see a couple in the
Corner locking eyes,
locking lips, a few passi-
natley dancing, some
Intrigued with the high,
I smell the danky weed lit
but the bowl is full of ash
I should've guessed by the
dank smell and slightly foggy room
that everybody's lit, they all took a hit,
Everyone is high, cross faded glossy
eyes, why am I surprised? Its in the open
no surmise, empty french fry containers
from five guys, its 2:37 in the morning
and it looks like the aftermath of when a
hurricane hits, all the food wrappers suggest
multiple hurricane hits, chopped and screwed
R&B got the scragglers feeling it, I guess it's
time for us to make like a tree and split...
Friend: Its make like a tree and leave or make like a banana and split, (he laughs)
Summer: You haven't seen back 2 the future huh?
Friend: back 2 the who? Sounds interesting.
Summer: bro I have it on my phone. I have a joint and magically I just found some dorritos, we're going to plop down on this floor, get stoned and watch Back 2 the future, you'll love it.
Monday, July 3, 2017
felt a little
the clouds disappeared
we saw the truth in 2 ways
but one way ease the blow
perception is a bitch but reality
is a hoe, life is easy its
how you view you I suppose,
its understanding that your highs
are therapy for your lows, its
questioning the question, while
answering the rhetorical, its not
having answers but expecting an
the rays on
the long summer
days, like life moves
slow because the day
never ends, kids outside
screaming making crazy
noise, teens breaking up
or romance begins to brew,
young adults transition into
the work force or college,
adults continue adulting,
secretly envious of kids,
kids jealous of adult freedom
but don't realize its not as free,
but life is what you make it out
to be...duality of man...
Wednesday, June 28, 2017
Winter: You must be high.
Summer: This coming from the man who said Angels sing to the universe heart beat...
Winter: Touche Summer....its not a bad thing.
Summer: what? Being high?
Winter: You know what I find interesting about lies, Summer?
Summer: ok....what intrest you about lies senor Winter?
Winter: They comfort us.
Summer: They do not. If anything, they make us not trust a person.
Winter: (laughs) yeah, that's most people's response..... look around you. This whole society is a lie, our whole life is a lie.
Summer: What is a lie?
Winter: now you're thinking summer....what is a god damn lie? (Looks at the sky) A man is suppose to have sex with multiple women and if he doesn't have a number count, he's looked at less by his peers; in reality most men, just like women, lie about there number.
Summer: I don't lie about my numbers.
Winter: I wasn't talking about you in general. I'm sure at some point you did...and when you did, you made sure you achieved that number.
Summer: What's your point Winter?
Winter: ah ha! So you did lie?
Summer: What's your point Winter?
Winter: being high isn't a bad thing...
Summer: What in the absolute vodka fuck are you talking about?
Winter: Not sure, can you spark up that joint please?
(Summer lights the joint, takes a hit, passes it to winter.)
Summer: Changing perspectives?
Winter: Yeah, Your Mom's perspectives! Oh!
Summer: Oh grow up old man!
Winter: Lighten up young sir...how ironic... (he smiles)
Summer: Are you going to tell me what intrest you about lies?
Winter: oh! Right! No matter what one lies about, there's one common emotion.
Summer: That's a lie, there's multiple reasons one would lie that links to different emotions.
Winter: hmm. You may be right, but all of those lead to one emotion.
Summer: Why can't you just let me be right for once?
Winter: Because when one is right, they're content; hence no change. A season doesn't change by staying the same; even in climates that don't see much of a difference between weather, there's still a change. So for us humans, we must never feel content, a soild answer maybe, but we should never feel complete...I want you to be different in Autumn, Summer.
Monday, June 26, 2017
Saturday, June 24, 2017
Wednesday, June 21, 2017
Summer is symbolic to our youth because in our youth, we're still deciding what we want to do; there's no pressure because the attitude of summer is care free, not to mention the long days which give the allusion of day being longer hence the lag on wanting to do things and get you life on the role. A lot of people can get caught in the hypnotic doldrums, the dreamy filter of life summer can present; when this happens, usually by mid to late summer, everything hits you in one shot. This is what they call the Saturn return which usually shows up in one's life starting around 27 and ending at 30. In summer, the signs play a role. You have Gemini ending spring and introducing you to summer, Cancer starting summer, Leo the dominant drive and influence, and Virgo ending your summer and helping you organize for fall.
The planets and stars that our key here are, The moon, The sun, Mercury, (on the Virgo side and Gemini side) Mars and Jupiter, the two planets not as dominant . Each one of these planets in Summer play crucial roles. Mercury is the planet of communication and intellect which shows up introducing you to Summer and conjuncts with the moon. The moon is responsible for care free, deep intuition, and feeling. In the first part of summer or in youth, this helps one become in individual, expressing how they feel. Mercury is in our skies till the end of June; as Cancer takes over, we become more influenced by the moon; which in youth, is the rise of care free, emotion, and deep intuition. The onset of Summer can be chaotic in a good way because cancer usually smooths out feelings and intuition guides us in the right direction.
As we move through summer, fire sign Leo shows up which in human life is about age 25. It gets tricky here because who we thought we were in cancer, gets thrown out the window. Leo brings the sun (shining light, yet warmth) Jupiter brings, wisdom, expansion which can be associated with graduating from college, an expanded mind and a few lessons learned, and Mars brings vitality, drive, which can be associated with prime and the time of life when we start thinking about kids and starting our career; on the flip side, youth is still dominant and wanting to hit the bars or travel is still an option, it becomes confusing.
Once we hit late summer and the light of Leo and jovial influence of Jupiter take back seat, organized intellectual planet of Mercury shows up again with Saturn and Venus in Virgo. In late summer or in human years mid to late 30's until about 45, we're organizing for later in life. Late summer is the cross roads where youth is still present but nothing compared to when we were in June. Summer comes to an end and who we were in June is a totally different person compared to September. Summer is growth, change, fun, passion, curiosity (but not as much as spring) a tad philosophical because we no longer are influenced by our parents, we've become individuals only for Leo to shine light on who we really are using the hypnotism of summer to ease the shock, and Jupiter's expansion to grow into a new and solid individual. Mercury shows up in compassionate and loving Virgo to connect with Venus for understanding and healing but with stern Saturn to make sure you don't repeat Summers lessons. Welcome to Summer and enjoy.
Monday, June 19, 2017
moment I layed
eyes on you and
I knew it was you
I knew what
to say, I remembered
that feeling as my broken
heart tried to feel love, racing
against time and watching how
things should have played out.
I knew that instant, that something
was off... its rare, that one gets to see
the time line of their life play out how its
suppose to, its like watching the tracks
and the train go on a different route, one
can only wonder what would've happened....
me from conveying
my vision into words,
possibly youth or confused,
possibly to many emotions
are infused, I am blindly in
love with you so my visions
explanation to the heart is
construed, ghastly lies turned
to romantic lullabies, dreamy
eyes turned into good byes, restless
nights soothed by the moon made for
number sequences and good
morning surprise, like tangled hair
our eyes lock and dive into a dream,
for a second we escape the mean, for
those seconds we are free, for a
moment is just you and me......
Rudely we come
crashing back into
a world of chaos, a
world of turns and
burns, back stabbing
and deceit, greed and
lies, jealous snakes,
zealous fakes, a rebellious
state, we fight for space,
causing havoc for peace,
using the opposite of emotions
to find a right in-between.....
What is love?
I don't know why when you chase money you find love, maybe its because chasing money puts you on so many paths, possibly the numbers are a formula, a language that unlocks the code of love...
math is formulas, chemistry, its solutions, problems, it divides, multiples, adds, subtracts, much like a relationship filled with tears and laughs, kids and romantic baths, an understanding and connection, the only thing that requires perfection yet mistakes are made...
you make it count....as we count the dollars, we dream of a life, this dreamy world of perfection because money... does it lead us to love? Why when one chases money does one find love? Why is it when one chases love one finds money? It's Like two trains passing each other with passengers wanting to go in the opposite direction of where there going...I don't know why when one chases money one finds love...
the moment I strike back and don't nurse the dirt you dished you begin to wish I didn't exist, your eyes flood with tears, you ears drown out sound as the lump in your throat gets tight and your dried damp red eyes swell like if they were wishing wells and your tears were thoughts, its like we transferred emotions and you feel the hurt you call love...
I know its love, I know the cliche Hollywood romance is for the screen of mind, I know you have freeze frame moments, you layed on top of rose pedals surrounded around boquets...
you can't tell something is an addiction until you try to give it up...
what's the difference between love and addiction? Why does love feel like lust? Why does anger feel like hate? I went for a walk in the rain and people looked at me strange. I realized what I see as a strange look might be someone's look of content. What do emotions look like? Everyone responds differently
why does one need the other? How come one can't exist without it? Is it in human nature to rebel? One day I got fed up with my boss and his tyranny and I wanted to throw a tire wrench through his windshield: the irony, I was to the point where I didn't give a fuck if these assholes were going to fire me, but I knew this year was the year that I would hit them with an iron fist but like night to day I realized we have different views but its the same date....
I don't know why when we're sure we're wrong, and when we're wrong we are right, when we plan it differs, without a plan we bicker and miss the bigger picture, lose the course and we become bitter...
balance is beautiful but it appears everything born from it isn't. As I open all the windows in my house, open the back door, open the front door, the wind ravish through the house when it pleased, rustling through the trees, carrying sweet scents of distinct flowers and swirling dead leaves....
tranquil by the cool air and the sun playing peek-a-boo behind the clouds, I shut the door to my room only for a gush to push the door open...
I want it closed, the wind opposed, I wanted fresh air in the house, the wind blows, but I close one window and things change...the door closed and the house stayed fresh...what is balance?
Late: what? Dude, that's soo unappropiate.
Early: It is?
Late: Yes, your basically implying that people who are religious have a mental problem and that's totally not cool.
Early: I wasn't trying to hurt anyone...I was talking to winter and winter said religion doesn't exist and people with psychosis see things that aren't there and---
Late: You were talking to winter? Dude Winter is harsh, cold, and old, of course he would imply religious people are crazy...did you ever think winter is crazy?
Early: why would I think that?
Late: because winter lives for Nostalgic moments and never gives an answer or if Winter gives an answer, he tells you to look with in to find the true meaning or some bullshit that makes no sense. Look, Religion is real, however the stories are kind of questionable.
Early: I don't get it..
Late: ok, religion exsit. We have artifacts, books, temples, churches, all kinds of real stuff to show religion exist. The stories are questionable but they have meaning.
Early: what's the meaning?
Late: read it dude, besides your too young to understand it.
Early: too young? Your only older than me by a few years.
Late: true, but I comprehend things a little different....look I'll tell you this much early, the stories religion present to us are a guideline, an example of what we should do...just keep reading, trust me you'll begin to change...and by the way, your question is totally unappropiate but sinceits something you're pondering, what do you think the difference between religion and psychosis are?
Autumn: ......its an emotion that's intense, a tad impulsive, its joy, happiness... love changes you and can make you do things you never thought before...
Spring: I don't understand.
Autumn: nobody understands it completely.
Wednesday, May 3, 2017
I plunder, and
fight the thunder
of passion that
What is it like to kiss?
disgusting at first,
its the initial shock,
the exchange of spit....
from a different
perspective it looks
soft and slow, like time
stopped....the way ones
lips slowly drag across the
face like a train to a wedding
dress, the obsessed stare and
tugging of hair, the ability of hands
moving across each others body
like a mime, pulling each other
closer signaling your mine,
kisses on the neck sending
goose bumps up the spine,
the light bites on the ear lobe
like your whispering naughty
thoughts to my mind, the
light grind against my zipper
telling me its time....
What is it like to kiss?
What if its not quite right?
What if the person is a lip bitter
but to damn hard, like from
erotic to pain, confusing my
What if its sloppy?
What if its a stingy
kiss from someone
with full lips? Like
there heart is still on
the cliff while the brain
went spelunking unequipped...
night eyes graze the sky with
a wish, what is it like to kiss?
Tuesday, May 2, 2017
to never trust strangers,
those are people you
don't know, those
are folks who want
to hurt and say all kinds
of nasty words, those
are not your friends...
but I'm starting to undestand,
strangers aren't just unfamiliar
Monday, May 1, 2017
Sunday, April 16, 2017
Why does everything
sound the same?
How come when
water hits a car, it
sounds like wind ruffling
through the leaves? Why
are things different with similar sounds?
I was at the ocean the other day and
I watched the sun rays glare, the water
splashed on the pier and left a puddle
at my feet. I saw a reflection in the
puddle and I saw the mirror that was me.
You told me
the son, you
told me the
devil is his son,
you told me it
was his most
you told me he
loves us but
damns us in revelations,
you told me 7 days
everything came into
creation, you told me
he loves me, you told
me Lucifer is evil but
God created him, Is
God a Liar?
for the divine?
Are lies real?
What's a lie?
What is God?
What is religion?
Is it real? Are
Is God a
lie or is
man a lie?
Is God a
man or woman?
go to hell?
and the cat
If we pray,
told to speak
get hurt by her
Ego? What's evil?
Why do we do
bad for good?
Why do we hurt?
Why did we fall
from grace? Why
did we lose immortality
to a snake? Why use metaphor?
Why not be direct?
Monday, March 20, 2017
Spring is a season of growth, rebirth, warmth, love, and change. Spring can be a complex season. As we wake from winters mystic slumber that aggressively tries to keep a grip on us, the energy of spring battles with winter, trying to keep the deathly cold grips of winter in its place. At times spring loses, other times winter loses, it really is a back and forth kind of situation yet unique. The symbolism displayed in Spring is symbolic to a person in youth, full of vigor, spontaneous, impulsive, energetic; there's not much tact in spring but the force spring has makes up for being tactless. Winter on the other hand is old, tired, very little to no vigor, yet is an extremely wise person with an abundance of tact, patients, and will. Winter is use to harsh weather and doesn't fear the force of spring. Winter teaches us to wait out the storm and attack when tired; yet spring whose also fearless, due to a lack of tenacity, a naive outlook, and a thought of nothing can kill me, teaches us with a enough force and stamina, you can prevail and defeat even the hidden.
Spring would fall with in the human age range of new born to about age 21. In these years, one does so many changes that one is practically a new person by the time summer arrives. Winter being the season of death, and Spring being the season of rebirth, really plays with the idea of reincarnation. In a post I have called Imagination, I've mentioned that I believe the imagination and imaginary friends that we have early on could be a connection to a past life; or it could be a child being a child, I'm open minded. In spring, its time to transform, search for answers and reasons; during this time of year, Jupiter shows back up in the skies and is a dominant planet. Jupiter is the planet of expansion, truth, education, knowledge, wealth, luck, justice, optimism, wonder, philosophy and mystic. This planet rules the sign of Sagittarius and teams up with Aries (Usually Mars ruled) in the third week of April (10th-20th). Venus, Mars, and Mercury also accompany the giant planet.
The energy these planets send to humanity is what ushers in the change. The luck from Jupiter, the fearless masculine energy of Mars, the love goddess Venus, and the intelligent communication skills of Mercury mix in spring. It gives spring many questions which is also sprinkled down from Jupiter, random love affairs from Venus, and the intelligence from Mercury to communicate and learn from past love mistakes or tips that Venus lovely bestows upon us. Mars is the undertone that keeps us fearless all through out spring. That fearlessness helps us grow due to constant mistakes. Once summer arrives you can look back with nostalgia and say, "Yeah, I made that mistake when I was 16." Winter never dies, its tactful and impacts you even when you thought you defeated it; you can't defeat the inevitable. Welcome to Spring.
Sunday, March 19, 2017
and out came life
teeming with spirit,
rebelled by energy,
forced by nature and
spelled by human dna...
one can crack the egg or
be the crack in the egg, one
can be the yolk or be the chick
you decide which grass is greener on
either side of the fence...nothing makes
sense in these final days, it all seems
everything is cracked, we're all walking
on egg shells, just the wrong slip of the
tongue is like the blunt end of the of a
counter...crack, boom, crack, slowly our
emotions ooze out into a pan sizzled and stirred
our society is scrambled...I want to be the force
within, I want to be the reason for the crack, not the
reason why its cracked...I guess either way you look
at it, why is the question that emerges....peace winter,
I'll see you next life time...
Imagine if everyone told the truth about themselves, what insecurities for others would break down. There's one person in your life who you idolize, but if you only knew there problems, you'd realize you're just as equal or similar.
We judge others yet we have dirty secrets; we make others feel as if they're worthless but the moment your demons are called out, you get a little a funny acting. Nobody cares. Call out the demons. The more we call out, the more we see we are similar. A demons job is to divide and conquer and they do that well with man. That's why we have people who feel like outcast in our society because of our judging. Let go of the ego. As I've read before, the Devil spelled backwards is Lived, a past tense, meaning it happened but its not happening today so it would be a lie to make someone feel like they are the person from yesterday.
What about Nostalgia? Winter shows us, Nostalgia is tricky. Nostalgia is seen as good and it is, but we should connect it with tradition. Tradition allows us to do that same thing we did last year but as the current person we are today so we don't live in the past. peace world and welcome to Spring.
would close because I
was sick of looking,
watching while everyone
smiled and dived into their
I got sick
of looking out,
oversleep so I dived
into the trance myself.
I became a light sleeper,
one eye up, one closed,
I slept in my clothes only
because when danger lurks,
its hard to sleep.
I get sick
wake up when
I sleep, fuck you,
I've been shaking,
waking your ass up
for some time and all
you do is roll over yelling
"five more minutes" 4 times,
now you got 10 minutes
to get an hour away.
Why do we wait?
you're mad at
me, in disbelief,
like I would lie
to you keeping
don't worry about
the now its here, look
I knew my
lids felt heavy,
I knew the storm
was windy, but
the bombs broke
the levy, I know
that was yesterday
but you seemed
to not learn from
lessons, you keep
praying to a God
asking for blessings,
he keeps speaking
because God is
with in us, you
keep saying man
is full of sin
how could divine
be in us? Because
dark without light
is asinine we're holy sinners...
at your door,
3 in the morning
yelling, "I want in!!!"
But nobody can hear.
The knocking from the
door is a vibe you
can feel, so I guess you
can hear through the
raised hair on your arm,
the ghost means no harm
just a tad confused, hasn't
quite figured out its need
to cross...there's a ghost
at your door, they want in,
pounding and pounding, screaming
and yelling, "haunting unfinished" and
yelling replenish, repeating a
sentence, screaming in penitence,
"I want in!!" There's a ghost that
knocks at your door...
Monday, March 13, 2017
many of us
to treat each other
many of us to
not fight, there's
too many people
with different definitions
of what means equal, the
only time a math symbol
isn't tied to a fixed answer,
a oxymoron species, we
don't understand emotions,
everything is connected
one word can trigger
commotions, we have
too much feelings in
our speech and careless
about the position of feet,
we care too much about lies
dismissing the truth, there's
too many of us to fall
under one religious roof,
we are a sensitive species,
we die too soon to know
life, even in winter years as
you grow wise you still search
the skies for right...
I can walk
down sunset obliterated
out of my mind...what is a sunset?
It's when the sun travels
through the sky until its
reaches the horizon...when
the son fell darkness squanderd
the land sprawling every second,
reaching dark spots until the sun fell...
the son never fell he just switched positions
to shed his light elsewhere...its a proven
fact that the sun ignites certain cells and it
can change things in our dna...sun light can
help with depression all you need is 7 minutes
a day...Hell was written as a dark space
because man did things in the dark, things
they would fear to be seen in the light, really,
all evil fears being seen, that's why they approach
in our dream because we dismiss visions as obscene,
once we remove the filter and believe in ourselves, to
know what we see is real, we don't fear the dark we
become he truth, so when the sunsets its not
darkness taking control, its darkness on the run...
Friday, March 10, 2017
They say angels
only fight with
using emotions, if
it doesn't make
sense we give into
the flesh, the more
we know, the more
we understand, the
stronger our angels,
the weaker our demons...
tricks can be confusing,
thoughts can be misleading,
everything in the environment can
be used for the pleasure of the demon,
everything has to be weighed before
action is taken, everything has to be
acknowledged before intellect is awaken,
the stars have to be aligned before war
is forsaken, growth of man has to be
stunted to see the changes that make him,
separation during growth shows the reflections
that breaks him, we can change the way we think
to grow closer to the maker, a change in our behavior
changes the world and breaks fixed habits....
We live for nostalgic
because our traditions
trigger happy memories,
we change our traditions and
in exchange get a fear of the unknown,
we hate not knowing that's why were
obsessed with time travel, the better we
understand ourselves we lose fear of the
dark, the better we grasp the brain, we can
for see our future before the start, we choose to
believe that all emotions are separate, we think love and
hate are different but its passion that connects them,
someone's love is someone's anger but perspective
changes vision you understand life a little different in
winter to bad our
They are peaceful. We could've been killed. Our evolution has been us but they've integrated with us, they've upgraded our technology through thought, hence the Ancient societies. They test us.
They stop speaking and observe to see if dna tells a story. It does. They know about angels. They know a little more about our universe and advanced beings. They are our guardians. We are a young species and left unguarded we could be in trouble; not everyone is kind.
They find us beautiful in a nostalgic way, we humans as a whole are there 16 year old kid. What we find annoying among us is cute to them, the stars have more twisted stories. Sometimes, they channel higher realms, they contact angels.
They don't understand death completely, somethings are still a mystery; everything is vast, they don't understand connections.
Wednesday, February 15, 2017
When the Indigenous
left, they headed west
to meet with gods of the
sea because of the sea
they were able to see that
we, humanity came from
oceans that rained from the
heavens and exploded with
life in to what we see...what we
retain, who will remain to see
the reigns of angels sweep the
earth and unearth the wicked, the
angels wait in position, heads bowed
eyes closed as the demons scream
the angels sing, summon energy from
the universe channeled through the gods
traveled through the planets, dispersed
through space and control the brain pathways
making us act right or wrong....
Tuesday, February 14, 2017
the universe using our
technology...in the hills
one can see the radiation
lines that blast in color
and stream towards
the heavens, the energy
is returned which we create
and return, advance,see
through deception and
burn through lies, it smells
like truth, it feels like hell, it
seems like heaven but together
its 7 plus 4 is 11 plus 11 is
22, separate the 2 and get
4,4,4,4.13, age of the universe
but DNA codes in reverse get
were multiplied in trillions...
The blizzard slammed against the large well built cabin walls, the winds roared and ravished at trees, blanketing the air with snow making visibility impossible. As the night disappeared and the mad winds made the snow billow and communications encumbrance to the near by small airport and people vacationing, inside our cabin the opposite occurred. We sat by the fire under the blankets and watched as the storm flickered with the lights finally putting the electricity to sleep. The fire danced in the dark room, as we lie naked under the faux blankets, drunk on champagne, high on each others lips. I grabbed another bottle of champagne. Before I opened it, I push back the blankets, popped the cork and let the suds spill on her breast. I put the bottle down, licked her cleavage, wrapped my lips around her nipple and softly swirled, licking everything engaging her areola.
Her very quiet but stern moan was muffled by the howling of the winds. I dived into her vagina face first like a plane crashing into the ground; lip smacking and tongue swirling. Her intensity begin to match the storm outside. Using both hands she grabbed my head firmly.
She caressed my hair softly, my stiff tongue loosened up and flopped back and forth on her clit, moving my mouth slowly in a eating motion. Her hands moved from the side of my head as she pushed my face deeper. Coming up for air, vaginal secreation on my face shined in the glow of the fire, she looked at me with the intensity of fire, passion of the storm, she leaped on me, kissed me and slowly began to ride me.
My face buried in her chest as she bounced slowly and firmly, she tossed her head back and let out a light moan, my hard fat dick throbbed inside of her wet vagina, her tight orgasmic vagina began to lightly hug my dick like a firm but gentle hand shake.
My arms wrapped around her, I softly scratched her back, kissed her neck, lightly like butterfly kisses, lightly bit it, worked my hands from the small of her back on to both of her hips assisting her, bouncing her, plotting her down on my dick and letting her sit on it before bouncing back up to continue creaming the sloppy wet mess she was making on my lap. No two snowflakes are alike I thought as I lied in the snow slowly dying, in and out of consciousness. For a moment there I think I actually felt my dick twitch to life; but the power of thoughts, that's what passed because the rest of me has failed.
The winds howl and my limbs way pass numb, the cold has made me delirious. I lay here in and out of reality; death teasing me bringing me out of a memory. Hours have passed and the only thing I can think of was that hot sex I had a few nights back. The blizzard is over, the winds are cold and the bite from the wind factor is like stubbing your toe on the corner of a chair multiplied by 20. It hurts. At some point I won't feel the dreadful cold.
The clouds slowly pass over revealing a beautiful bright moon and dazzling stars. Its so clear. So beautiful. Its so quiet. A few snowflakes gently fall to the ground from the frozen heavens above. Breathe in, breathe out, breathe in, breathe out. The cold air fill my lungs making it hard to breathe but I can feel that. Only in winter can one see reality because the dreams stop. The maturity of the season doesn't allow for dream state. As I lay here facing the stars, gazing the heavens, flirting with death, reality dies only to wake up in spring..
Tuesday, January 10, 2017
such a long
life I can't
from haunting. The
daunting voices have
images, the taunting
images have become
diluted with time or
maybe I've grown,
I've out grown matters,
so things that meant alot
to me, those problems
have become laughter.
In old age you save your
tears or they run dry, the pain
you felt before seems to be a smirk,
which turn into a laughter of cry. My views
on things have changed, my fight for
policies and fair acts that roared like
a lion has become soft and quiet like
snow flakes in a forest, at some point
in your life you realize people are only
for change if they're for it, but if
what you're saying is truth they'll ignore it...
Friday, January 6, 2017
Winter: Mankind as a whole is a 16 year old.
Summer: How so? How can you make such an assumption? Where's your facts?
Winter: Just look around you for your facts.
Summer: You're going to have be more specific than that, winter.
Winter: Summer, focus on someone else besides yourself and look around you. Do you even talk to other people besides those in your "squad"?
Summer: Do you even talk to people before making bias assumptions?
Winter: Every year I take 6 months and travel the world, not six months altogether but I travel the Northern hemisphere for 3 months and when it gets hot in the north, I travel the Southern hemisphere for 3 months. I've talked to vast amounts of people, well as many people who share a common language as I...the one thing I've noticed is nobody completely understands themselves, Summer.
Summer: I do the same exact thing winter, except when its cold in the north, I venture south for 3 months and I come back up to the north in June. In my travels, I've noticed people have different views; I feel the "misunderstanding" you're seeing is perspective in my opinion.
Winter: ah, perspective. Such a beautiful thought with an imaginary meaning. Its the cognitive dissonance of life that distorts the vision of feeling, yet blinds the eyes of truth.
Winter: One day Summer you will grow to become me. Its only a matter of time before the complications become an intricate yet simple answer; even then you still get faced with the oxymoron that is life. Would you like a drink, Summer?
Summer: Got any patron shots.
Winter: I was thinking scotch on the rocks.
Summer: Bruh, I got work in the morning, I'm not trying to get fucked up--- well maybe, hold on, let me check my schedule ( looks at phone) don't work tomorrow, looks like we're about to turn up in this bitch.
Winter: Yes, turn up in this bitch. (Sighs) Must your language be so vulgar?
Summer: Its a saying; besides I'm not referring to a woman as a bitch, I'm calling the place we get inebriated in a bitch, it doesn't have any feelings.
Winter: Everything created has feelings through energy, Summer; by the way, I do have patron, I don't mind taking a trip down memory lane Sumar, as the Nordics use to call you; can you manifest my nostalgic thoughts?
Summer: (Lights up joint) yeah hold up...(Coughs out smoke, takes a shot) Whew!
Winter: (Slowly takes a shot) thus Summer begins.
Thursday, January 5, 2017
Spring: What's the difference between psychosis and religion?
Winter: Religion doesn't exist.
Spring: Yes it does, we learned about it in school and the teacher showed us this big book with stories in it...
Winter: Do you know what psychosis is, spring?
Spring: its when a person has an over active imagination?
Winter: (laughs) not quite...where did you even pick up the word and "definition" of psychosis? And what lead you to connect religion and psychosis?
Spring: Because in religion, our teacher told us about a man name Jesus who turned water into wine and psychosis is people with big imaginations and my teacher said we can't see God but he's all around us, then we had to draw a picture of God in class and I said I couldn't draw God because I don't know what he looks like and then are teacher said go with faith and I asked what is faith? He said believing in something you can't see and then I remembered the video I saw on Facebook about psychosis and how people see things that aren't there, what's psychosis?
Winter: Wow that's a lot to take in for such a young mind...Autumn should probably limit your internet use...psychosis is characterized by an impaired relationship with reality. It is a symptom of serious mental disorders; usually these people have hallucinations or delusions. Don't classify religious people with psychosis.
Spring: ooohhh...what about people who say they saw Jesus walk on water?
Winter: Spring, what's the difference between psychosis and religion to you?
Spring: I don't know...what is it?
Winter: I'm not answering, its my life question and gift to you. I told you what psychosis is, your teacher has introduced you to religion and told you what faith is but you still ponder. Some have wondered if the consciousness of man has shifted and all of these stories the ancients speak about are true, its possible everything is in front of us and we got sick of seeing these powerful beings and we choose not to see anymore; thus psychosis, ADHD and others are created mental disorders for when we start to see the truth...
Spring:......................Can I have some cheetos?
Wednesday, January 4, 2017
Monday, January 2, 2017
Sunday, January 1, 2017
in me, I
we want to see,
I believe in
You like you
Believe in me...
I love you
I like to hold
You like you hold me,
I miss your hugs
and pretty smile,
I believe in you
like you believe
and the way you
use to gaze in
mine, I loved
to you even
if it was for
a short time,
I cherished your
30 seconds makes
me glow for weeks, I
didn't care what
you said because
every word you
spoke was sweet,
I loved your chin
and your soft profile
drove me wild, I loved
your smell and how
your walk drove me wild,
I loved your style, I loved you,
I still do but I can't
dwell on what